Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Mei Immortalis Amor

At the end of October 2011, I've had to say goodbye to my most fave character in Supernatural - Castiel. I'm saddened by this, it took me a long time to get over it. I guess after they had a December 2011 cliffhanger and left Bobby in between life or death... I finally can talk about my Castiel. But it did leave me feeling a bitter because Bobby had a whole episode dedicated to his death (which may or may not happened, we will know somewhere in January 2012) but Cas had only few minutes time talking to Dean. Guess it is how fate rolls it doesn't escape the make believe world of TV series. Fate has it this Castiel character ends that way.. *sigh*

 I'm gonna start with this picture - Last night on earth

In this picture all the characters who are not Dean and Sam are now dead. Well if Bobby returns in January 2012, he will be only one left.

"So the morning we got there to shoot that, I said to Jensen, 'You know, I don't think we have any...strict rule on what we're gonna do with this coat, but what seems to me, when they fold up a flag at a soldiers funeral, there's kinda this specific way they fold it.' And then he (Jensen) goes, 'I would take it with me, I would put it in the trunk of the car. I'll take it, because it's silly for me to leave- I wouldn't leave it.' And so we agreed on that." -Guy Norman Bee, Director

In this vid it started of Dean taking Cas's coat and folding. It interlace of scenes them together in the past how time and time again Castiel save Dean and those he care about.

I did it, all of it, for you.

A bit of AU-ish vid for Castiel's death

Castiel: I feel regret. I just wanted to make amends before I die.
Dean: Does it make you feel better?
Castiel: No. You?
Dean: Not a bit.

Castiel: I'm sorry, Dean.
Dean: I'm sorry, too then.
Castiel:What's the point if you don't mean it?
Dean: Cas, I would have died for you. Please, I've lost Lisa. Don't make me loose you, too.

The Fallen Angel - Castiel

This vid has nothing to do with Cas's death, but I love the the usage of other scenes from movies, esp the scenes of John Constantine walking through hell. This is because Castiel character's appearance was model after Constantine :D

Monday, November 28, 2011

Celcom USB Modem Using Maxis Broadband SIM Card

This is from my own experience.

If you have this usb modem from celcom

The problem you only can use Celcom Broadband Sim card right. Using the software Celcom give you.

Remember before the modem was in usb drive, it was in the form of e600 data card you use with your laptop? Celcom Data Card E600. You use its software for your maxis Broadband Sim Card. If you have forgotten how it look like this is how

See the data card software is from Celcom 3G and the my network is maxis :D.

This installer can be use for your Maxis Broadband using your current usb Celcom modem or any variety mix. I'm using it currently. So you don't have to do hassle hacking. Just install this software into your computer

I tried looking up this installer in the net. But I couldn't find it anyway. So the trick is NOT in the usb Modem or in the SIM card. But it is in the installer software. If you could find something similar you can use it :D

Good luck

Monday, September 19, 2011

Memorable monologues : Babylon 5

The memorable monologues for me

Monologue from Season Four
spoken by just about everybody

Lennier:   It was the year of fire,

Zack Allen:   the year of destruction,

G'Kar:   the year we took back what was ours.

Lyta Alexander:   It was the year of rebirth,

Vir Cotto:   the year of great sadness,

Marcus Cole:   the year of pain,

Delenn:   and the year of joy.

Londo Mollari:   It was a new age.

Stephen Franklin:   It was the end of history.

Susan Ivanova:   It was the year everything changed.

Michael Garibaldi:   The year is 2261.

John Sheridan:   The place: Babylon 5.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011


Have you ever felt that you are worthless?

You are mediocre, you are not good at anything at all like other people

This is how I am today. Hell I'm not even good at what I graduated for. I work as what I studied.. but as time move on, I mostly do the management stuff, I stray away from my core subject.

I don't know how to dance, I'm fat, I'm not pretty, I have no social skill and very few social friends (practically a loser), I don't have any talent (do I really have no talent?), I do not have a good voice to sing (But I could do an awesome music vid, and some collage artwork or photomanip), I don't know how to play musical instrument except for a recorder when I was in my primary school, does that count? I can write fiction/fanfiction in english, I could never write those fic in my own mother tongue, but I never been to write any finish fiction/fanfiction in english or any good article that is publish worthy. It's mediocre, like everyone else right.

To sum it up .... I'm good at nothing.. am I really????

What would I want to be good at? I wish I'm good at writing, not too good like Stephen King or something like that. Why? Am I not worthy of such a grandeur dream? Does it have to do about the genre that I want to write? I wish to write stuff about 'guilty pleasure'

Ok I'll be honest I want to write about yaoi romance :P. In my reality it has a lot of restriction, moral restriction, culture restriction, religion restriction...I cannot even begin with the religion restriction even with hetero romance too (the one that have all those erotic stuff).

Why do I want to write yaoi romance and sell it? For money? Do I really need the money? And the answer is no it is not for money and I don't really need the money.. well just not that bad. So I could write it for free, for myself, for stress reliever and self therapy (just like what I'm doing now anyway). Well if I write it for free then the religion restriction will have less impact. People must be wondering the heck is this restriction anway.. basically the restriction is not so much about the moral issues well it has some component to it, but the major ones is about the earning of the money. If you get it from a 'legal' way or 'illegal' so to speak. If you're earning from writing 'trash' stuff (all this are in the context of the per say religion point of view) so the earning will be 'illegal' and it has points in the after life. So if you get it, you get it, if you don't, you don't.

Well back to the point, what if I write for free? There will be no financial impact for the religion point of view. Yes I would like to do that, because then I would feel my life would be not so worthless? What is the connection? Because I did something that I really like and it will make me feel better or good even. Hence I will be not worthless... in my own point of view anyway and this will make me happier. Not to other people, people who are in the same culture and religion background. Their opinion is as always unchanged perhaps more worst.. they will see it negatively.

So what's more important here, is how you see yourself, how you judge yourself. If you are worthless that means that it is not really what other people think, it is WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT YOURSELF.

How do I make myself see that I am better??? Now that is another story...

Sunday, May 15, 2011

The May - December Thingy 2

When Tony Met Jethro lol! They (TPTB series) really need to stop teasing us fans with all this subtext stuff

I didn't do this, they did it :P

This is suppose to be a flashback eppy when Gibbs first met Tony, while he was working in Baltimore. It has a connection with their Port to Port Serial Killer (p2p killer) sounds like you can get kill while using torrent heh

Tony's ex-partner was found dead and it looks like a p2p killer that did it, or was it?

This is how Gibbs first met Tony. Way too much flirting the way I see this scene lol

The first Gibb's legendary headslap *gasp* oh my effin! and 'face touch' lol

I feel bittersweet watching this scene and it's kinda romantic too.

'Then' was the moment Tony found out his partner had took bribe and he don't know what to do with it, and Gibbs walk in.

"Now' Tony found out that his ex-partner was not killed by p2p killer and Gibbs walk in

I'm going out on a limb and post this awesome 'slash' fic by xanthe. So if you do not know what slash is, please stay away from this link. Saves us both some 'flaming' time. Anyway you need to have a livejournal acc to read this.

 Xanthe’s fic : Title: My Big, Fat, Slashy Story of Gibbs and Tony

My Brother Sammy

This is my life... it's pathetic, it's lonely. I basically have no friends. I mean the close ones in regards to locations. The ones that you go shopping with, watch movies... how do I end up here? I had a 'Sam Winchester' once in my life. I was Dean and this person is my Sammy without the 'wincest'. But my Sam is sadly not Sam Winchester, my Sam is more worst than Sam Winchester. My Sam does not know what is the meaning of honesty, friendship, love and family.  My Sam did more than just fuck around with Ruby. My Sam became Ruby and like any other demon, they lied, they betray and then they stab you in the back. Do I have regret for being Dean to this Sam? I don't know, maybe I do, maybe I do. Through the years I grew up, my Sam was a constant, thus then I was happy. But regrettably, My Sammy does not know what Dean meant. My Sammy had Dean all this while, since the very beginning, do not know how to appreciate that.

Some people say, I made the wrong choice when I decide to be Dean to my Sam, but I guess if things do not happen the way it does, then I would not know. I would not know how a person could do a 180 degree and turn into someone you don't know anymore. You read it a lot in the fiction, watch it on TV, but now I know how it feel. If I could say, I made wrong choices, I guess I could put it on the things that I choose during my studies.  I imagine life without Sammy going through university.. I would still end up alone here today I guess with no friends in the same location

But in the end, I realise I'm no Dean Winchester because Dean would take Sam just as he is... tainted with demon blood and all. But what would Dean do, if Sam turns into a demon?
Dean would try and save Sam, I think. But I'm not Dean... and I don't save Sam. Is  it because we're not of blood like the real Winchesters? Would I want to save my Sammy, if we were blood?

I don't know...

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Carry On My Wayward Son

My Brother Samuel Winchester
Sam : Lilith did not break the final seal, lilith was the final seal. I killed her and I set Lucifer free

Sam : Problem's with me, how far I'll go

Ruby : You're the only one who could do it?

Sam : Why me

Ruby : Because it had to be you Sammy

Mon Ange Castiel

Dean : Look me in the eye and tell me that you are not working for Crowley

Cas: I'm doing this for you Dean

Dean : Son of a bitch

Cas : I'm doing this because of you

Dea : When crap like this comes around we deal with it, like we always have. What we don't do is we don't go out making other deal with the devil

Cas : It sound so simple when you say it like that. Where were you when I needed to hear it
Dean : I was there, where were you?

Crowley : You know the difference between you and me. What are you Castiel. What exactly are you willing to do

Dean : Damn it Cas! We can fix this
Cas : Dean! It is not Broken!

Friday, May 13, 2011

Versions of You : Of John Sheppard and Rodney Mckay

This SGA vid has been in draft seems like forever... I don't know when it will really be finalise

How can you start a conversation with  "You know I once met another version of you" and not turn it into a love story?

R : You know I once met another version of you. I don't think there's much different between you and that other John Sheppard I met

R : That field medic, the one you defied orders to go back to try and rescue. It's a hard choice. Certainly you didn't intend things to go badly as they did. Don't always go the way we play

R : A little while ago we accidently open a rift in space time - went through to an alternate version of reality. It was very similar to ours in many ways. We met a team much like the one I work with, only you were the leader. You were a hero, saved the world several times over.

J : Doesn't sound much like me

R : It's amazing how one incident can entirely alter the course of your life. Still, I like to believe you have the same strength of character.

J : What do you want me to say

R : For now nothing

The Man Who Would Be king

I just cannot get over the awesome eppy... oh my Cass, what have you done?

He is running from his wildest thoughts. He is running from his everything
He is looking now to find something, Hoping he could be saved

Looking for the conviction that he craves, He needs to find the answer sooner or later
Pushed himself to the limits, He had to strife for all the harder things in life
But what the cost to give him now

Maybe one day they’ll forgive him what he’s done, with all the pain of lying too early in the grave

The man who would be King by Iron Maiden

vid by ToruFinalFantasy

To do or not to do, that is the question

I don't have confidence. Somehow doing vid is so much easier than writing fic. But I finally have one finish.. *sigh*. I'm always a Dean/Cas girl... but this muse wouldn't let me go so this is Meg/Cas (because of that effing hawt kiss they do duhhh!) and it is NC-17!!! (So now you know why I categorise my blog to adult) egadzzz... well nobody's gonna read it.. and i'm just gonna put the excerpt here lol!

I really thought of sending it to a beta in meg_castiel lj community.. Maybe I just put the whole fic at go la la la la on my merry way...maybe I should? *sigh* maybe I shouldn't... I'll think about it some more :P

Working title : The darkness to your light, the hatred to your love
Working tagline : "certain regrettable things are now required of me" 
meg background is inspired by merlin.
spoiler until 6.20
Meg/Cas nc-17
warning violence, semi-consensual
you know supernatural tv series? You're good to go 
Excerpt ....

He returned some time later. She thought he was finally going to kill her. She curled her lips at him and snarled. "What's the matter Clarence? You back for more?"

In the blink of an eye he was in front of her and grabbing her neck. She felt his fingers burn. And then he kissed her, it was a bruising and domineering kiss but she felt something stirring inside of her nonetheless. When he released her, she was breathless and found herself looking at his cold blue eyes. Suddenly she felt his fingers touch her neck. Something is forming around it, something cold. She felt the chains disappear. She looked down and saw it was a steel ring around her neck; it was the same steel that made the chains. He yanked it and  brought her face close to his.

"Who owns you Morgane?" he spoke.

The name made her shrink into herself, she hasn't heard that name for hundreds of years. It was her human name. Meg was the name of her previous host. The Winchester brothers kept calling her that and there was no need to correct them. She'd learned that she had to guard to her true name because of the dangers it holds if others knew and at this moment she knew exactly what it meant. He yanked her collar again, snapping her out of her thoughts, waiting for her answer. How did he know?

"You." she had to answer.

Satisfied with her answer, it was the first time she'd seen his expression change. He had this proud smirk on his face. He traced the colar, she saw it was in Enochian. And then she felt the steel colar sink into her skin and around her demon form. She realised that even if she changed her host body, he would always find her, that much she knows. She cursed inwardly. As she watched him leave, she wondered about the colar, there were Enochian letters carved on it. She could only guess that it was a name it bore because it had seven letters. Castiel.

Castiel kisses like a pro even tho this is his first :P
Angel + porn = Angel Boner lol!

by ILoveThesePeople

The naughties : Jus In Bello

Let me interrupt this program by pointing out naughty things the actors do outside the supernatural show.

Here is the result of too much boys and screaming female fans

I like to point out that most of them are happily married with little copies of them at home lol!

Note : Thanks to all the tumblr that I follow and blogging this awesome pics
Original tumblr post are

And the rest have reblog and added the photos for us to swoon, drool and squee

*Jus In Bello = Justice in War (is a title of a SPN eps). It is also name for the Rome SPN Convention

The May-December thingy

Michael Shanks saw an episode of MacGyver being filmed and it reportedly helped inspire him to become an actor. Then he co-star with the actor who played MacGyver in  Stargate and got slash with him too lol!  

If this is a real life love story - it is more epic than brokeback mountain :P. 
I miss SG1 and SGA sobs!
Song title : Aristotle and Averroes
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